本可作“送子观音”,而这位医生的行为却令人发指

【美洲华联社讯】当孩子想要追根溯源寻找生父时,她却发现了一个惊天的秘密。自己孩子瞳孔和头发的颜色,都和当初做试管时选择的捐精者资料对不上号,反而跟做试管的医生有种说不出的神似。

  25年前,在一段长达12年的恋情失败之后,荷兰女子埃丝特-路易丝⋅海伊(Esther-Louise Heij)做了一个大胆的决定,她要用精子库的精子和试管技术生娃,当一个单亲妈妈。

  经过多番考察,海伊打听到在鹿特丹有一家诊所,那儿的负责人思想非常开明有远见。就是本文的主人公简⋅卡尔巴特(Jan Karbaat)。

  “The doctor seemed very good at what he did,” she says. “He was a pioneer in his attitudes. He talked me through what it would be like to raise children on my own; he seemed very serious and professional.”

  “医生看起来做得很好,”她说。“他的态度很开明。还给我分析了独自抚养孩子会遇到的问题。他看起来很严肃,也很专业。”

  And he was supportive, too, of her hope that any children she had would be able to know their father. “He assured me that would be possible. He was an important doctor in a white coat. I trusted him; it never crossed my mind that I couldn’t.”

  对于海伊想要孩子将来能知道自己的生父是谁的希望,卡尔巴特医生也表示支持。“他向我保证,会让他们知道的。他是个身穿白大褂的有影响力的医生。我信任他,我从来没有想过我不能信任他。”

  The doctor, Jan Karbaat, told Heij that he would find a donor whose physical attributes fitted into her family. “He asked me for pictures of my relatives, so he could find a good match. And he said he would make sure the donor was a man who would be open to being traced later.”

  随后卡尔巴特告诉海伊,他会找到一个身体特征适合她家庭的捐献者。“他问我要我亲戚的照片,这样他就能找到一个匹配的捐精者。他说,他会确保捐献者是一个愿意日后能被查到的人。”

  ▲ The man who may have secretly fathered 200 children (via the Guardian)

  在卡尔巴特的帮助下,海伊先后生下了女儿洛蒂和儿子约纳森。

图 via the Guardian

  当洛蒂长大后,她并没有强烈的寻找生父的愿望。而约纳森就不同了。

  “For a boy to grow up without a father figure is a big thing; a father is important, especially for a boy. I wanted to know who he was: there were things I wanted to ask him. And I wanted to find out whether certain ways I behaved were connected with him – things that made me seem different from my mother and my sister, like that I’m much more laid back than they are.”

  “对于一个男孩来说,童年缺少父亲的身影影响很大;有个父亲很重要,尤其是对一个男孩来说。我想知道他是谁:有些事情我想问他。我也想知道我的某些行为方式是否与他有关——那些让我看起来不同于我母亲和姐姐的事情,比如我比他们更懒散。”

  ▲ The man who may have secretly fathered 200 children (via the Guardian)

  2011年,海伊带着约纳森前往鹿特丹展开寻亲之旅,却发现卡尔巴特医生的诊所在2009年就已经因为违规而被关停。他们转而求助有关组织,得到的回复是:档案保存不当,很难找到当初的捐精者。

  但是母子俩没有放弃,打了无数个电话,填了数不清的表格,希望能在某个地方找到这份信息。就在这过程中,他们慢慢发现了有些不对劲。来找卡尔巴特医生的,不止他们一家……

  他们陆陆续续遇到了另外一些在这儿做过试管的妈妈们,大家都发现,自己孩子的瞳孔和头发颜色都和当初看到的捐精者资料对不上号,反而跟卡尔巴特医生有种说不出的神似。

截图 via YouTube

  很快,流言四起。有人说捐精者是同行的医生和医科学生;但最令人沮丧的是有传言说,大部分精子是来自卡尔巴特医生的。

  “We were in shock – it was a feeling of total disbelief. Karbaat was a doctor, and to use his own sperm to get women pregnant would have been totally prohibited. It was difficult to process the enormity of what this meant. But right away I thought:‘This man could be my father.’ I was scouring pictures of him, looking for physical similarities.”

  “我们简直惊呆了,完全无法相信。卡尔巴特是一名医生,用他自己的精子使妇女怀孕是完全禁止的。很难理解这意味着什么。但我脑子里立刻蹦出一个想法:’这个人可能是我的父亲。’于是我到处搜寻他的照片,想要找出外表上的相似之处。”

  Yonathan was thrown into emotional turmoil. He had previously written to Karbaat asking for information about his father, and the letters had been returned unopened. “I thought, is that how little he cares? He seemed so cold, so arrogant. And this man could be my father – it was all very hard to come to terms with.”

  约纳森完全陷入了混乱。他以前曾给卡尔巴特医生写过信,想跟他了解下自己生父的情况,但这些信压根没被拆开就退回了。“当时我想,他就如此不在乎吗?他看起来那么冷漠,那么傲慢。而这样的人却可能是我的父亲,这一切让我难以忍受。”

  ▲ The man who may have secretly fathered 200 children (the Guardian)

  于是,一群在卡尔巴特诊所通过试管受精出生的孩子家庭启动了法律程序,要求允许他们使用卡尔巴特的细胞进行DNA检测,以查明自己孩子的生父到底是不是他。然而卡尔巴特及其家人却以侵犯隐私为由拒绝提供DNA。

  2017年4月卡尔巴特去世,享年89岁。据报道,他曾私下跟人说他用自己的精子孕育了60多个孩子。实际上到底有多少,可能他也不知道。

  就在刚刚过去的这个周五,法院公布了最终结果,卡尔巴特被确认为49名子女的父亲。

  One of the children, named Joey, said he could “finally close the chapter” now he knew Mr Karbaat was his father.

  其中一个叫乔伊的孩子说,现在他知道卡尔巴特先生就是他的父亲,他“终于可以翻篇了”。

  ”After a search of 11 years I can continue my life. I am glad that I finally have clarity,” he told Dutch broadcaster NOS.

  在接受荷兰广播电台NOS采访时,他是这么说的:“经过11年的找寻,我可以继续我的生活了。我很高兴我终于弄清楚了。”

  Tim Bueters, a lawyer who represented the 49 children, said he was pleased about the outcome of the case after years of uncertainty.

  这49个孩子的代理律师蒂姆⋅比特斯表示,经历多年的不确定,对目前案件的结果他还是感到很高兴的。

  ”It means that there is finally clarity for the children who are matched,” he told NOS.

  他在接受NOS采访时说:“这意味着,匹配上的孩子们终于对自己有了清晰的认识。”

  ▲ Dutch fertility doctor used own sperm to father 49 children, DNA tests show (via BBC)

  然而卡尔巴特已经去世,没有人知道为何当初档案保存如此混乱,也没有人知道他使用自己精子的意图是什么,想要将后代撒满全世界,还是认为自己的基因比所有人的都优秀?

  无论如何,他的一己之私导致很多人大半辈子都活在痛苦迷茫中,而且这种影响可能还会伴随一生。而那些不是他后代的人,也因为档案的遗失,可能一生都解不开自己的生父是谁这个谜。

  对于卡尔巴特的做法,你有什么想说的?(文章来源:环球时报 法广 文:A君  资料:the Guardian, BBC)